Love Dare Day 30: April 19, 2020
What is Day 30 about:
Division always brings destruction, while unity creates growth. This chapter deals with any division in our relationship.
What do I think about the material:
Do you have a secret that you keep from your partner? Is it out of shame, guilt, or just plain embarrassment? This chapter doesn’t talk specifically about secrets, but it brings to my mind one of the easiest ways we create division in our relationships.
Today, I am going to speak more specifically to men. I believe our gender has a harder time with the concepts in this chapter than our better halves. I think we all know the statement I made in the introduction is true, but do we believe it to be true.
I know in the beginning of my relationship with Jessica, that there were aspects of my life that I was ashamed of. We would joke each time she learned something new that it was my former life. But there is magic in her discovering these secrets.
We are called by God to love, honor, and serve our spouses. In the pursuit of love, if we keep something to ourselves then we are doing none of these things. However, we will continue to lie to our own hearts and say we are doing this out of protection.
Well, I want to circle back to the opening statement. This creates division and division only brings destruction. It is imperative for a healthy relationship that we keep our spouse on the same page. And as the author of your own story, you must read her the chapters.
My task and how did I perform the task:
Today’s challenge is to isolate one area that creates division in my relationship and pray about it. Specifically to ask God to reveal anything in my own heart that is threatening our unity as a couple. It also asks to have me commit to keeping Jess on the same page.
There are two areas in our marriage that can create division if we don’t constantly talk about it. If you know us well, you can probably guess them. But for our privacy I will not reveal them here. However, I will pray about them both.
Jessica’s reaction:
Like I said, we have to constantly talk about our two areas. I don’t have a specific reaction from yesterday, but I do have reactions from the past. We married almost 9 years ago and discussing these topics has been a learning adventure.
In the past when I would bring them up, I was blunt and ended up hurting Jess. After doing this too many times, I learned that I need to speak to her heart and not focus on the action. I found that not only did she respond better, but I began to understand the root of the problem. I believe this communication has been key to the success of our marriage.
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