I Apologize

I left SEL in April 2019. Almost 3 years later, there is something I need to apologize for and I didn’t realize until last night.

Sitting in a half daze, partly from the muscle relaxer I am taking and partly from the long day, watching Superstore on Peacock, Jess turns to me and asks a simple question from my blog post yesterday, “why don’t you add spaces after the subhead?” I glanced over at her phone and to my surprise I see her reading my blog post. My surprise is the first reason I need to apologize, the second is for the spacing.

For the first apology; I found myself genuinely surprised that anyone would read my blog, much less have an opinion on it.

Let me explain.

When I left SEL, my plan was to write to help and entertain anyone who reads my work. The first work I wrote, besides my blogging, was a two-act play, Blinders, I hope PCT will one day workshop and perform. That play went to paper first, because it tackles some pretty heavy subjects that I believe are at the center of our dysfunctional society. Therefore, when writing, I focused on the story and impact, not the formatting and other details. Looking at it later, my passion is in the right place, but my quality was not.

I hope its not too late to apologize

This is the first song on my writing playlist. I am hoping it is not too late to apologize.

My surprise from my wife reading my post came because I lost my focus on why I am even trying to write. My #1 reason has always been to entertain and help. (Yes that is one reason and not two). However, in practice, my main purpose has been to pump out content to help drive traffic to my website and eventually click on links that can make me money.

I have lost sight of my purpose and again, I apologize and will not put pen to paper, or magically have words appear on this digital screen again unless its purpose is to entertain and help. But why the spacing apology?

What am I supposed to do now?

Truth time, I want people to click my links so I can make money and support my family. But that purpose can not supersede my passion. In writing or really anything you put your heart into, we must put quality in our end product, otherwise, why do it at all.

Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well.

Philip Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield, in a letter to his son back in 1774.

We must not only pursue our passion, but we must do this with a mindset that I will put quality in my work. After all, isn’t my readers worth the effort?

For my second apology, I would like forgiveness for not putting adequate time in formatting or making sure you, my reader, have a phenomenal experience when reading my work. I pay attention to links, SEO, keywords, feature images, excerpts, and readability, but not much to the user experience.

From this post on, and anything I publish after, I will focus on quality instead of potential clicks. I am also taking this to my personal life. Cooking breakfast for Jess? Then it will be my best. Will I burn eggs from time to time, yes, but, when I burn those eggs, they will be the best-burnt eggs I’ve ever made. She deserves at least that.

Let’s take a moment today and think about the projects, tasks, or merely day-to-day living and ask ourselves, where can I put more quality in versus quantity?

Here is a few of mine:

• Helping my kids with their projects.
• Any project I am doing that I don’t want to do.
• Anything I write.
• Social interactions.
• My blogging.
• Loving my family.

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