Love Dare Day 31: April 20, 2020
What is Day 31 about:
Have you ever wondered why the pursuit of the prize is often better than the prize itself? Today’s chapter discusses how we are to break the natural tie with our parents when marrying. And also, cleave to your new spouse.
What do I think about the material:
The verse is very common among counselor’s conducting premarital counseling, and there is a good reason for it. The Bible says in order for a marriage to function properly, we must leave our parents and cleave to our spouse.
But what does this even mean?
When the Bible talks about leaving your parents, they are not speaking to the physical separation that most newlyweds want. What they are referring to is the responsibility that our parents have for us is now shifting. The role of your parents shift from a discipline perspective to a mentoring one.
The father is no longer responsible for the spiritual development of his daughter, but that weight is now on the shoulders of the husband. So once we leave the responsibility of our parents, what role does the man play?
I want to take a moment and talk about what cleave means and how it relates to the pursuit of love. At first glance, the word cleave means to hold on to something strongly through separation. But wait, I thought we were to hold on to our mate?
The Bible says to, “cleave to,” not to cleave from your mate. The word cleave is a strong word that means to completely separate from the things preventing you to attach. In chemistry, if a bond has cleaved from another, there is no way to join them back together. That is the intensity we are to seek with our partner.
As males, we experience this intensity when we are dating. I have seen guys do some pretty stupid things to cleave to their girlfriends. That intensity should not waiver once we are married. In fact, we kind of have it backwards. Yes, we should pursue our future mate, but the intensity should really increase when we are married.
Imagine how our wives would respond if we pursued them daily like when we were all dating. I know my wife would be surprised.
My task and how did I perform the task:
The challenge for today is to first, make sure we don’t have any pending leaving issues holding up our relationship. Jessica was not my first wife, but in my first marriage I can admit I had leaving issues. In this marriage, however, I know I am past that part of my growth.
The second part is to make a commitment to God that we will put our relationship with our spouse above any other human being. Basically keep the pursuit alive and make sure no one gets in the way. Look out kids, here I come!
Jessica’s reaction:
We laughed for a minute when we talked about whether or not we still had leaving issues. If you know my family well, you will understand. As far as pursuing her, she mentioned that I do this well, but I want to challenge myself to do it better. I remember having her melt when we were dating.
I can’t think of the last time I really made her melt. Look out Jess!
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